Be Still...Wait on the Lord

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I was standing outside of the ER at the hospital the other day, waiting for Glen to pick me up. I do this often since a neurosurgeon told me the worst thing I can do for my neck injury is to drive. I have found his words to be true. When I drive, I usually pay the penalty for a week or two afterward with increased neck pain and headaches. To avoid this, my husband graciously acts as my chauffeur in most situations.

As I was standing there waiting, my first temptation was to be irritated at having to wait. After all, our society is now one in which waiting has become a negative thing. We have fast food, fast news, fast entertainment. We expect fast medicine, fast service, fast recoveries. . .from anything. I began to think about waiting and about the rush in which our society has found itself. The verse came to mind immediately, "Be still and know I am God" (Psalm 46:10)

Be still. How foreign that seems these days to be still and wait. But if we don't be still and wait on the Lord, how can we hear His voice? How can we know His will?

As I write this, my sweet beagle Sparrow is cuddled up next to me as close as possible. I love Sparrow so much and one of the reasons is because she teaches me so much. She teaches me about how I should respond to the Lord, and how my feelings for her are a tiny shadow of what the Lord feels for me.

When we leave in the morning for the hospital, Sparrow often gets to ride with us (she loves car rides.) But she will stand still and watch me, her eyes looking to me for guidance, waiting to see when I start to leave. She doesn't rush ahead of me. When I start to walk toward the door, then she follows.

Each morning, her simple act of respect and love touches my heart. Her acknowledgment of me as her authority and leader humbles me and strengthens my role at the same time.

When I come home in the afternoon, she is waiting at the door, not only her tail wagging, but her whole body wagging in joy. She is thrilled when I bend over and pet her and talk to her about her day. And I am thrilled that she has come to greet me with such obvious devotion.

How much more must be the relationship we have with our Lord. When we still ourselves to see that "He is God", and in doing so acknowledge His authority and Headship in our lives, how much it must touch His heart. When we come to Him in devotion and love, how His heart is thrilled and filled with joy.

He loves us. He cares for us. He joys over us with singing. We must only let ourselves be still. Be still and we will know that He alone is our God. And we will know that He alone is enough.

"Wait on the LORD: be of good courage, and he shall strengthen thine heart: wait, I say, on the LORD." (Psalm 27:14)

A Mother's Heart in War. . .6-7-04. . .Day One

The Friday entries of "The Powder Room" are currently from a journal which I started when we found out our son was going to be deployed with the United States Marine Corps to Iraq. The journal was not written with the intention that it would ever be read by anyone else, much less published in any way. There are feelings in the journal that are deep and true and I wasn't sure at first I wanted to share them. But there are many sons and daughters still serving in our armed forces and I think it might be good to share "a mother's heart" with you what those other mothers may be facing. The entries are shared as a tribute to my son and his service to our country, and to all those sons and daughters who continue to willingly place themselves in harm's way for the protection and preservation of liberty.


June 7, 2004 Day One

It was a very hard day. the morning started with distracting myself from what was to happen in the afternoon. It seemed as if Noah would never return from the Unit, but I didn't mind the delay too much -- it kept that inevitable moment at bay longer. then, more abruptly than I thought it should happen, the moment was upon us. We gathered on the carport while Glen prayer -- I had to concentrate on other things to keep from turning into a mass of tears. Then Em and I and the Glen said goodbye first, so that Aimee and Noah could have time alone.

Once again eloquence neglected me. I had such a fragile grasp on control, I could only manage to say, "I love you son." After a quick kiss on the cheek, I walked away and retreated to the dark quiet of my bedroom and burst into tears. I knew that sometime while I was in there, he drove away and not watching that truck leave seemed much more difficult than watching the van pull away toward Parris Island three years earlier.

Overall, the emotions of the day were much harder than I had imagined but deep within a quiet peace prevailed. It is a strange combination, this deep intense emotion in the feelings and the quiet calm in the Spirit.

Then came the smile in tanglible form. . .a knock on the door and then Glen handed me a beautiful arrangement of flowers. How surprised I was to read the card:

Thinking of You

Anita Sonja Sheila Nycole

The thoughtfulness of friends at work brought more tears, but grateful ones. Like a blanket on a cold day, their love wrapped around me and warmed my aching soul.

It reminded me of Aimee, after I had said goodbye to Noah and had come into the house, she hugged me and said, "Don't cry, he'll be okay." And I had thought I would be comforting her!

I was a hard day, a very hard day, but in some respects, a very good day, too.

Where Is The Wind?

As I was standing outside the hospital this afternoon, I was enjoying the brisk breeze across my

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face. I watched the trees swish and sway with the wind and I thought of the verse:

"The wind bloweth where it listeth, and thou hearest the sound thereof, but canst not tell whence it cometh, and whither it goeth: so is every one that is born of the Spirit." John 3:8

Try as I might, I could not see the wind. I could see leaves moving, I could see branches bending. I could feel my hair swirling around my head, but I could not see the wind itself. I could feel it on my face, and it's coolness was a refreshing promise of fall finally coming to the warmer part of our country. But I could not see the wind.

Recently, I have had the pleasure of coming in contact with several people with whom I went to high school, and some of the teachers at the school as well. I have enjoyed reconnecting and catching up with these familiar faces from the past, and it has made me look backward at the path my life has carved through time.

While those days were going on, I often was unaware that the Lord was the "wind" pushing me along a certain turn in the path. Sometimes I just thought I was making my own choice, even though some -- like the choice to become a nurse -- seemed to just come out of the blue. Looking back though, I can easily see the leaves blown by, the branches bent. . .all the traces of the "wind" in my life. It humbles me, it makes me so grateful, to think that a merciful God was watching out for me and leading me, even when I thought I was leading myself.

Oh, thank you Lord for parents that surely prayed for me often!

Here in the Deep South, when the days are hot and humid, the worst of all are when there is no wind, no breeze, no respite to the oven we call our climate. Sometimes in our lives we walk through some "dog days" (sorry, Sparrow) as well. But the "wind" is still there.

"The Lord's hand is not shortened, that it cannot save; neither His ear heavy, that it cannot hear:" Isaiah 59:1.

He is still leading, still guiding. It is His work that He has promised "He which hath begun a good work in you will perform it until the day of Jesus Christ" Philippians 1:6.

Dressed for the Job. . .

Several weeks ago, Glen and I were out kayaking in the bay and we were navigating around a mass of reeds. I had held out my paddle to push away from the edge and made a comment about it being my "sword". It reminded me of the Armour of God listed in Ephesians Chapter 6:

"Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness; And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace; Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked. And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God: Praying always with all prayer and supplication in the Spirit, and watching thereunto with all perseverance and supplication for all saints."

When we go kayaking, we must be "dressed" for the job we are doing. We must have our "armour" on, or we won't be safe and we won't be effective. Thinking on this, I began to correlate the passage in Ephesians to the things we take and wear while kayaking:

Loins gird about with truth - in the summer I wear a bathing suit; in cold I wear neoprene. One keeps me cool, the other keeps me warm. Keeping my body in the right temperature range is important out on the water. Too hot, or too cold can both create problems when far from shore.

Breastplate of righteousness - my personal flotation device, well-fitting and buckled. The most literal definition of righteousness means, "he who is what he ought to be". Well, a good kayaker is one who is first of all, safe. The first and most important measure of safety while boating is a proper fitting and properly applied PFD.

Feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace - I always wear my water shoes; in the cold I add the wonderful waterproof socks Glen just bought me. The water shoes are to protect my feet from shells or rocks that might be on the riverbed. If I should need to get out of my boat, I would need sure footing and the shoes give me that.

The Shield of Faith - the one thing that shields me from the water and the gators -- my boat. There would be no kayaking without the kayak!

Helmet of Salvation - I always wear a hat and sunglasses. The hat saves my skin from the sun's rays as the sunglasses protect my eyes.

The Sword of the Spirit - My paddle without which I could not navigate the river. The paddle not only propels me, but it provides direction. Without it, I would be at the mercy of the current to just float whatever way the current would toss me. The paddle allows me to steer and turn my boat and direct it in the way that I know it should go.

Praying always for the saints -- I find the peaceful quiet of the kayak a wonderful place for prayer. The sights and quiet sounds of the river lend themselves to thoughts of the One who created all in sight.

We know that all the seven parts of the Armour of God are fulfilled in the Lord Jesus and provided for the Christian through Him. I like to think that He is also providing Himself as those things in our "armour" for the kayak as we travel up and down the rivers, across the bays and along the creeks. We know without question that as we paddle, He is our safety and always He is our safe harbor.

(You can also view this entry on our blog about kayaking, beyond the bow.)